I loathe Diabetes
This was a late night rant. . .still needs posting. . .feelings still valid.
Im so damn angry. . .I can’t tell if the angry is also created this sadness or if its just a combination. I never seen my life like this when I was younger. I never seen myself at 34 living alone truly alone. I know Im a warrior and have lots of warriors around me. I also know lots of people do it. I just never knew so many people had so many negative views of people who had diabetes. I didn’t know that people views us a plagues and unhealthy un datable. I had no idea we were such monsters. Everyone has all these theories and opinions on how and why we are the way we are. Its simple its genetics. My dad is super healthy. Works out daily he is super fit, ripped you might say and his doctor made him lose weight. . .With the thought that he would be able to be off the meds. . .nope still on them. I was first diagnosed with PCOS Poly cystic ovarian syndrome when I was 19. I had no clue what was happening with my body I just knew I was having periods like no other. I was told then what I had and what it was. Over the years I tried to regulate it with metformin lots of it. Birth control and many other meds to deal with the side effects that come with this wonderful condition. However I was always told I was diabetic. I refused the meds. My doctor would always say “Quit the booze, fast food and lose weight” and for years Id do just that over and over until my sugars even on a strict diet would average 350. Id feel perfectly fine until it would hit 200 then Id feel like I was super low. Im now on day 17 of my new meds and on the same meal prep type diet I’ve been on the last year. I’m down 17lbs. I’m also down on myself, Im down a BF and Im trying to find my bearings about it all. I want to be healthy. I just also want everyone else to be just as happy for me. More understanding, less judgement. My struggle is a beautiful disaster and that’s just it . . .its mine. I hope to hear more of your stories. I know it gets better. This isn’t my worst day nor is it my best no matter what it’s a blessing. Positive vibes friends
-Corissa
Im so damn angry. . .I can’t tell if the angry is also created this sadness or if its just a combination. I never seen my life like this when I was younger. I never seen myself at 34 living alone truly alone. I know Im a warrior and have lots of warriors around me. I also know lots of people do it. I just never knew so many people had so many negative views of people who had diabetes. I didn’t know that people views us a plagues and unhealthy un datable. I had no idea we were such monsters. Everyone has all these theories and opinions on how and why we are the way we are. Its simple its genetics. My dad is super healthy. Works out daily he is super fit, ripped you might say and his doctor made him lose weight. . .With the thought that he would be able to be off the meds. . .nope still on them. I was first diagnosed with PCOS Poly cystic ovarian syndrome when I was 19. I had no clue what was happening with my body I just knew I was having periods like no other. I was told then what I had and what it was. Over the years I tried to regulate it with metformin lots of it. Birth control and many other meds to deal with the side effects that come with this wonderful condition. However I was always told I was diabetic. I refused the meds. My doctor would always say “Quit the booze, fast food and lose weight” and for years Id do just that over and over until my sugars even on a strict diet would average 350. Id feel perfectly fine until it would hit 200 then Id feel like I was super low. Im now on day 17 of my new meds and on the same meal prep type diet I’ve been on the last year. I’m down 17lbs. I’m also down on myself, Im down a BF and Im trying to find my bearings about it all. I want to be healthy. I just also want everyone else to be just as happy for me. More understanding, less judgement. My struggle is a beautiful disaster and that’s just it . . .its mine. I hope to hear more of your stories. I know it gets better. This isn’t my worst day nor is it my best no matter what it’s a blessing. Positive vibes friends
-Corissa
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